Week on the Island’ is written by Doug Bennett and is an update to friends
about happenings in Key West last week. Everything is true except for those
parts that are lies.
Some rain, lots of sunshine. Mostly in the 70’s.
week I read ‘The Key West Reader’. The best of Key West writters’ 1830-1990.
I had a
tourist at Turtle Kraals ask ‘Where do you keep the manatees?’ – in the ocean
another ask as he walked down Duval ‘How far is it to mile marker 37?’-37 miles
me to thinking about the really dumb things I have been asked.
is the 7 mile bridge? 7 miles
are 42 bridges to Key West, which one do I take? All 42 of them
water go all the way around the island? Definition of an island
keeps the island from floating away? A big anchor
kind of money do you accept here? American
time is the second sunset? What second sunset?
sun always set west of Mallory Square?
How far is it
between mile markers? 1 mile
Are the coconut
trees real? Yes
Where do the
homeless people live? If they had a place to live, they wouldn’t be homeless.
Are the gay
people real or actors?
anything to do in Key West?
Can you watch
the sunset from Mallory Square every night?
Can I get my money
back if they cancel sunset?
How far is it to
America from here?
Why do so many
people speak Mexican? They are Cuban and speak Spanish.
Are the wild
alligators tame? Wild –Tamed?
Why isn’t it
cold here in August? She thought she was south of the equator.
I’ve looked all
over Key West and haven’t found Paradise yet.
The tourist with
7 small empty bottles. She wanted to get a little of each color of water in the
Keys. (The water is clear, the color comes from what is on the bottom).
Can I ride the
Conch Train to Cuba? How long can you hold your breath underwater?
It was spring
break and had been raining for days. A young lady said, ‘It’s OK, it doesn’t
rain inside the bars’.
Do I need a
passport to go to the reef?
What street is
the lighted boat parade on? Boats are in the water
Union is a Schooner (boat) in the Key West Bight. They are frequently asked. I
need to send some money by Western Union. How long will it take?
you have got to love it
'Close to Perfect, far from Normal’
Lat 24.5591N, Long 81.8016W